Move Out of Your Room

It sometimes seems odd that the master suite of many homes is about the size of a studio apartment, yet only one or two people stay in it while the guests are given a tiny room or a collection of several couches and cushions. This can seem like the most convenient arrangement for a hardworking host, but then the host must suffer the inconvenience of tip-toeing around sleeping people as they get their household going for the day. They must keep their home space functioning around the suitcases and belongings of guests in the common spaces.

If you have a generously sized master bedroom, I highly recommend giving up your personal space to groups of people who will be staying in your home for a while. It can actually make it easier to control the atmosphere of your home. If you are open to the idea and wondering when it might work well, consider the resources in your home.

Ask Yourself:

• “How many people are coming together?”
• “Will they be here for multiple nights?”
• “Where should we be in order to make the best use of my home?”

One night won’t be worth the effort of moving out of your room, but three or four might. One person rarely merits the effort of two people giving up their room, but it could happen.

The most important step you can take to assure that the arrangement works well is to do a good job moving out. Take a few minutes to depersonalize your room. Don’t go to extremes; just de-clutter the tops of your bedside tables and dressers. Keep those spaces clear so that your guest can use the space with ease and without worry.

Get your clothes out of the space. If your company is staying for a long time, you don’t have to get everything you own out of the way, but try to think of your needs for 5 days at a time. Pack as if you’re going on a trip. I’m a person who does best with physical lists (not mental ones). Make a list for your clothes and your toiletries or use the same list you use for travel. If you’re not used to this, think through each step of your day and ask yourself “what do I need when I shower? What do I need for my bedtime routine? What will I wear for my Tuesday workout and what will I change into to go volunteer? Ect.” I packed things into baskets and toiletry bags in order to keep them contained while using my kids’ bathroom.

Avoid: popping in and out of your master bedroom. This will make your guests feel as if they are a constant inconvenience to you. That’s the last thing you want. It certainly happens while people are staying with me that I fetch things out or put things away in my room, but I try to have what I need for those key transition times of the day like morning and bedtime.

Avoid: leaving nothing for your guests to use; I’ve done that before. I emptied my shower of my towel, razor and favorite shampoo and forgot that my guests might need a few of their own bath-time supplies. I like to leave the guest towels folded on the corner of the bed so that they have no doubt about what is for them. Then, I’ll point out the hooks for towels and assure them that everything is there for their own use.

One last word of advice, avoid promoting yourself to sainthood. Giving up your bed for someone is a nice thing to do, but it’s a far cry from giving up your life for them. If you have guests who are rude and/or ungrateful, you’ll be more resilient if you view your choices as practical reflections of your personal philosophies on how to host and run a home. Make sure your mate is on board with your ideas and if they aren’t don’t force the matter. Regardless of who is in your home, you can always be the most gracious.